After seven years Lainey Corbert knew that their marriage was a bit stale. She knew that
Daniel's interests had wandered. She knew about the fling with the office slut, and the brothel on that “business trip” to Vegas, and the cybersex that he was having with his high school girlfriend, also married, on Facebook. She knew about all of this, but couldn't bring herself to ask for a divorce.
The simple truth was that Lainey didn't believe in divorce. She took the vows “'til death do you part” seriously. So rather than file for divorce, something so shockingly simple that it sickened her, she decided that she would win him back.
She cooked dinner more, and allowed Daniel to go out with his friends without complaint. She had lost all of the weight that she had put on since their wedding and then some. Not only could she fit into her wedding dress again, it was actually loose on her; she knew this for a fact because she tried it on one night when he was “working late”.
Lainey knew she was attractive, guys hit on her whenever she was out without her husband, but she always turned them down. It seemed to her that the only person who didn't want her was her own husband, but she hadn't given up because, even though she didn't find him as attractive anymore either, she had taken a vow, and held herself to it.
She decided to pull out all of the stops and do something he really loved. So Lainey arranged childcare for the kids, and planned a camping trip for just her and Daniel so far out in the woods that their mobile phones wouldn't even get a signal. She hated camping, but he loved it, so it would be worth it.
It was on the second afternoon that things came to a head. They had eaten a late lunch of fish that Daniel had caught, and Lainey had happily cleaned and cooked (she felt that she had hidden her revulsion at cleaning the fish well), and had then gone hiking.
The hike was steep, long, and tiring, and Lainey knew that without her weight loss, it probably would have killed her. The trail ended at the top of a steep hill on a rock outcropping that overlooked the valley below.
The view was beautiful, or at least she thought it was once she caught her breath, and she was happy to be able to share it with Daniel, but when she tried to put her arm around him, he pulled away.
“What's wrong, honey?”
“Elaine, I know that you hate camping, and that you did all this for me, and it really is wonderful, but....”
“But what?” Lainey asked, a sinking feeling in her stomach.
“But... I think I want a divorce.”
Somewhere deep inside the brain of Lainey Corbert, something quietly broke, “What?” she said softly.
“We've been living a lie; we made a mistake. We weren't meant for each other, and I think I've found my soulmate now.”
“We have two kids and a mortgage, and you've just now realized that we're a mistake?” her voice climbed to a yell.
“I'm just trying to be honest w-”
“So who's your new soulmate? That skank from your office, Hannah? Or perhaps Hayden, the girl that dumped you on prom night?”
Daniel's mouth dropped in silent surprise.
“Yeah, I know about them; I've known about them for over a year! While you've been screwing around I've been doing everything I can think of to try and save this marriage, and now, after everything I've done, now you want a divorce?”
“It'll be better for both of us, you'll see. You'll find someone who's better for you-”
“I don't want someone better, I want you! I swore to be with you until death do we part, you asshole!” Lainey shoved Daniel with both hands, and he staggered back a step towards the edge of the outcrop
“Honey, calm down.”
“I will not calm down! I am out here in the middle of the damned woods because you like to camp. I hate camping, and fishing, and football, and all of the stupid things I've been pretending to like to try and make you love me again!”
Another shove, and another step back.
“Honey-”
“No! No more honey!”
Another shove, and Daniels stepped back again into open space. His arms pinwheeled for a second, trying to catch his balance, but it was too late. He fell out of sight; Lainey heard the meaty thud of him hitting the rocks below.
The terror that sprung up inside Lainey was immediately crushed by her anger. She looked down over the edge to see Daniel lying motionless and broken on the rocks below. She felt no sadness at this, just more anger. She kicked at a large rock that was lying on the ground, and it rolled over the edge, landing on the body of her husband below.
“There's your goddamned divorce!” she cursed.
Her mind started working; planning. In the morning she would drive to where she could get a cell signal, and call for help. “My husband went hiking, and never came back,” she would cry. She'd be sad, and wear black, and collect the life insurance, and start over.
But that was in the morning; until then she'd mourn with the pint of Ben & Jerry's stashed in the icebox. It had been a no-no while she was dieting, but she supposed she had earned a treat; this camping had turned out better than she could have hoped.