By Jeremy Dunn (bandanna, carousing, copper)
Once upon a time, near a place called Juniper Gap
Lived a bunch of ruffians, in an old clap-trap
Of a cabin roughly hewn
They was Leroy, Clem, and Delbert McGee
Nasty bunch of fellers you see
Why they’d sell their ma if’n be she bring a fair price
One day this ‘lustrious trio, after a long night of carousing
Hatched a half-baked, hair brained scheme to improve their lot in housing
“I’m tar’d of walkin out the back door, to answer the call of nature,”
Said Leroy as he hitched his britches
“It’s cold and dark, and besides all that, them leaves we’re usin’ really itches.”
“Way-yall,” drawled Clem, “I reckon you’re right and sumptin’ oughta be done.”
“Grab you a bandanna to cover yer face, and go on and pick up that there gun.”
So the boys made their way through the holler and up a hill.
To Old Man Peter’s Mountain Mash still.
While Leroy made sure no one was lookin’
Delbert and Clem stole all of the still’s copper tubin’
For use in makin’ a modern privy
They figgered they had this one in the bag
They let their down their guard and lowered their rags
Then Clem lit a match better for to see
That Mountain Mash was right powr’ful stuff
And those liquor fumes were flammable, sho’nuff
That still went up with a mighty awful roar
Them boys scampered and scooted, back to their cabin
Singed and stinkin of whiskey
They learned crime don’t pay, moonshine is strong
And plumbin’ projects are pretty risky
Once upon a time, near a place called Juniper Gap
Lived a bunch of ruffians, in an old clap-trap
Of a cabin roughly hewn
They was Leroy, Clem, and Delbert McGee
Nasty bunch of fellers you see
Why they’d sell their ma if’n be she bring a fair price
One day this ‘lustrious trio, after a long night of carousing
Hatched a half-baked, hair brained scheme to improve their lot in housing
“I’m tar’d of walkin out the back door, to answer the call of nature,”
Said Leroy as he hitched his britches
“It’s cold and dark, and besides all that, them leaves we’re usin’ really itches.”
“Way-yall,” drawled Clem, “I reckon you’re right and sumptin’ oughta be done.”
“Grab you a bandanna to cover yer face, and go on and pick up that there gun.”
So the boys made their way through the holler and up a hill.
To Old Man Peter’s Mountain Mash still.
While Leroy made sure no one was lookin’
Delbert and Clem stole all of the still’s copper tubin’
For use in makin’ a modern privy
They figgered they had this one in the bag
They let their down their guard and lowered their rags
Then Clem lit a match better for to see
That Mountain Mash was right powr’ful stuff
And those liquor fumes were flammable, sho’nuff
That still went up with a mighty awful roar
Them boys scampered and scooted, back to their cabin
Singed and stinkin of whiskey
They learned crime don’t pay, moonshine is strong
And plumbin’ projects are pretty risky