By Linda Boulanger (Late~Anxiety~Continue)
“OMGee!” The “G” standing for goodness, of course. Kelly Lynn Wilson, thirty-eight year old preschool teacher, was so very straight-laced, she’d never say anything out of line like that. She’d always been a shy, by-the-book type of girl and that prudish attitude had led her to decisions and actions, or lack of actions, many years ago that she’d regretted. Almost regretted. Even though she wished things could have been different, Kelly was one of those people who believed everything that happened in life came about to make a body the person he or she should be.
But now … she waved a petite hand in front of her face trying to assuage the heat that had crept into her already naturally pink cheeks, knowing she should not be having the kinds of thoughts she was having. Thinking about old crushes and what might have been, especially rekindling a fond daydream of him meeting her in the art hall between classes, was definitely not where her focus should have been. Then again, it wasn’t every day a girl turned on her computer and clicked a link that hit her with an immediate blast from the past.
But Kelly Lynn had that morning. She’d clicked the reunion link in an email and there he’d been, right there, on her screen along with the date counter. Three months, fourteen days, and seven hours and she’d come face-to-face with the boy who, twenty years earlier, had made her heart patter harder than any guy ever had, including her husband.
Ex-husband.
That word still made her cringe, leading to that sickening slither inside. Even after six and a half years, she still felt the shadow of failure permanently trailing behind her. So much for ‘til death do us part, she thought. Barry must have had his fingers in his big ears when the preacher mentioned that part because when things got tough, he got going, leaving her with a mountain of fertility specialist bills and no one to share her life with.
Missy meowed about that time as a reminder that Kelly wasn’t completely alone. The little Calico cat demanding in her reserved, yet bossy way let Kelly know it was time to get moving, and a few treats in the cat bowl on the way out would be greatly appreciated.
“Okay, girl,” Kelly told her, replacing her sigh with a not completely felt smile as she stepped away from the computer to grab the cat treats. “So, what do you think, Mis? Am I being silly to even get my hopes up?” The little cat cocked her head then mewed again when Kelly Lynn hesitated over the cat bowl. “Sorry.” She poured the treats then stroked the little cat’s multi-colored back. “You know, his status said single. And we both know mine does too, through no fault of my own.” Kelly wished she actually felt that way. Barry had made it perfectly clear why he was leaving…and so had the belly of that bimbo she’d seen him with a few months later. Babies! Why were they so important anyway? And what did it matter that she’d been unable to have them?
She’d answer that later. But for now, she’d better set her mind to getting ready to leave. She had a bunch of other people’s children to take care of. Ah, the life of a childless preschool teacher. Talk about irony.
#####
“I don’t know, Cind. I mean, what if he doesn’t even remember me?” The small, auburn haired woman wrestled the bag of groceries that rested on her still-shapely hip while she fished in her bag for her keys to let herself back into her apartment. Her sister, only a year older than her, had already caught wind of a check mark next to Kelly’s name on the reunion roster, knew exactly who else was going, and what his marital status was. To say Cindy Murray was a busybody was an understatement. Almost as petite and well preserved as her younger sister, Cindy was highly single, childless, and extremely happy with her status and life.
“Then he’ll remember me.” Her slightly evil laugh told it all. Cindy had inherited all the not so good girl genes Kelly Lynn had not.
“Cynthia Marie Murray! Don’t you dare tell me you and Jake Sumner…”
“Okay, I won’t tell you,” Cindy interrupted, her laughter turning to an all out snortfest as Kelly continued her tirade.
“You are so… So… Oh!!! I can’t believe you! All those years of letting me drone on and on about him. You knew I liked him. You knew it and still…” An audible growl punctuated a grunt from Kelly as she finally managed to open the door.
“Oh, come on Kelly!” Cindy could barely talk through her laughter. “It’s not like you were ever going to do anything about it. He wasn’t your type and we all knew it.”
Kelly thought about that, listening with one ear while her sister went on about Kelly’s type and how she’d only had eyes for Barry Big Ears, before slowly returning the one-sided conversation back to the undeniably delicious Jake Sumner.
She hated to admit it, but Cindy was right. She was so afraid that Jake wouldn’t or couldn’t really see her in a girlfriend sort of way that she’d been afraid to try. She remembered all those hours alone with him while she’d been his Algebra tutor during their senior year so he could remain on the football team and not lose an athletic scholarship. He’d seemed so relaxed during those tutoring sessions, opening up to her, sharing things about himself that she was sure he didn’t go around telling everyone. And she’d certainly never told anyone, not even Cindy, that Jake Sumner was the boy she’d shared her first kiss with. She could feel her blood pressure rising while her mind floated back. Why, oh why had it happened the day before he left for college when he’d stopped by to thank her for getting him through the math course? All those years of daydreaming about meeting him in the art hall only to have him kiss her right there in her parents’ living room…
“…but he’d be oh so worth it. Consider that a tip from a girl who knows.” Cindy’s words broke the reminiscing. “Hey! Maybe I could get in touch with him before the reunion. Maybe drop a bug in his ear that a certain someone will be there waiting anxiously to see him?”
“And I’m sure you’d stop at just talking. Cindy! Don’t you dare. If you so much as…”
“Bye, Sis.” Cindy’s laughter tormented her through the receiver. “Let’s plan to shop this weekend. You don’t have much time for me to whip your boring wardrobe into shape for your rendezvous with Jakey Wakey! Who knows? Maybe he’ll kiss you … again.”
The line went as silent as Kelly Lynn’s breath. That Cindy! She knew everything … way too much for anyone’s good. And her nose was always in somebody else’s business. Mostly Kelly’s!
#####
Kelly Lynn was late getting to the afternoon reunion mixer. The anxiety she’d felt over seeing Jake again, or more over whether he’d see her, had made it nearly impossible to get ready without spilling this, or dropping that … all things that added to the time it took her to get ready, though once she walked through the door, she was glad she’d taken those extra minutes with her hair and the cute little dress Cindy had helped her pick out. She looked good; younger and springier than most of the other girls she’d graduated with twenty years before. Life as a preschool teacher wasn’t glamorous, but it wasn’t hard either, for her anyway. She taught the 4-5 year olds and loved helping them learn and grow. Her life, for the most part, was just like her: calm and even-keeled. And she knew that all worked together for her benefit. Even losing Barry. For the first time, she felt almost glad he’d walked away, realized being alone was definitely better than the loneliness she’d felt whenever he was around.
She pushed those gloomy thoughts from her mind, broadening her smile as a group of girls came up to hug her. She hadn’t had a lot of really close friends and yet everyone had loved Kelly. She spent the next forty-five minutes catching up with just about everyone … except the one person she really wanted to see. Disappointment gripped her insides and she let her head drop, missing the look on the faces of the other women gathered around as they gazed longingly over her shoulders.
“Hey, Kelly Lynn. How are you?”
Strong hands on her shoulders accompanied the masculine croon into the back of her hair.
“Jake,” she whispered, mostly because that’s all she could muster.
He chuckled lightly, pulling her against him, his arms wrapping around her upper body. “I was hoping you wouldn’t leave before I got here, especially after Cindy went to all the trouble to track me down to let me know you’d be here.” His voice was still a whisper, meant only for her ears.
Kelly Lynn leaned a bit to the right, craning her neck so she could turn to see his face. Cindy! Bless her soul.
“Good to see you too, Jake. Now let go of me so I can get a good look at you.” Kelly squirmed out of his grip and turned to look into the bluest eyes … eyes she remembered looking so deeply into hers right after he’d kissed her and right before they’d been interrupted by her older sister barging in. He’d smiled back then, chuckled a bit, and kissed the knuckles of her hands clutched in his. And then he was gone.
Until now. Here he was, again, her hands in his being raised toward his lips. Kelly thought she’d die a happy woman right then and there. It was obvious Jake Sumner was there for one reason and only one: her.
“Ladies,” he spoke to the group though his eyes never left hers. “If you’ll excuse us, we have some unfinished business that should have been taken care of years ago.”
Kelly wasn’t sure whose grin was bigger as he led her away from the group, though she was sure her laughter held an edge of sheer surprise that his did not.
“I was so afraid I’d be too late,” he told her as they walked out of the room, his arm slipping around her shoulder to pull her close. “You have no idea how many times I’ve kicked myself for leaving things undone with you, Kelly Lynn.”
Her brows crinkled a little. “Why didn’t you come back?” How different their lives might have been.
He shrugged, bit at his lower lip just a bit. “Your sister walking in kind of … it made me realize just how awkward things could be. I mean…”
Kelly laughed a little. “I know you two have history.”
“I don’t know if a few shared kisses can really be called history.”
Kelly was surprised to see his face turn a rosy shade of red, more surprised that it had only been kissing. But she smiled anyway, quite certain her sister had misled her for no other reason than to cause her to react. That was Cindy… knowing exactly what Kelly needed.
“Besides, when I came back at Christmas you were already with Barry Big Ears.”
Try as she might, Kelly couldn’t stifle the laughter that bubbled up at the way he said Barry’s name.
“You could have fought for me,” she teased.
“I should have. In fact, if he shows up here, I think I might have to go ahead and kick his a…”
Kelly was quick to put a hand to his mouth. She was already shaking her head. “It doesn’t matter. We’re here now.” She looked up to see where they were, unable to suppress a wide grin. “The art hall? Really?!”
He laughed as well before pulling her into the secluded little alcove just beyond the art room. It had been dubbed Lover’s Lane when they were kids. Kelly had never been there before, even though she’d dreamed about it many times … always being swept away to that place in an enchanted fairy tale that included Jake.
“This should have happened a long time ago, too,” he told her as he pressed her against the wall, moving to cover her mouth with his.
“Here’s to taking care of unfinished business,” she whispered against his lips before losing herself in the dream.
“OMGee!” The “G” standing for goodness, of course. Kelly Lynn Wilson, thirty-eight year old preschool teacher, was so very straight-laced, she’d never say anything out of line like that. She’d always been a shy, by-the-book type of girl and that prudish attitude had led her to decisions and actions, or lack of actions, many years ago that she’d regretted. Almost regretted. Even though she wished things could have been different, Kelly was one of those people who believed everything that happened in life came about to make a body the person he or she should be.
But now … she waved a petite hand in front of her face trying to assuage the heat that had crept into her already naturally pink cheeks, knowing she should not be having the kinds of thoughts she was having. Thinking about old crushes and what might have been, especially rekindling a fond daydream of him meeting her in the art hall between classes, was definitely not where her focus should have been. Then again, it wasn’t every day a girl turned on her computer and clicked a link that hit her with an immediate blast from the past.
But Kelly Lynn had that morning. She’d clicked the reunion link in an email and there he’d been, right there, on her screen along with the date counter. Three months, fourteen days, and seven hours and she’d come face-to-face with the boy who, twenty years earlier, had made her heart patter harder than any guy ever had, including her husband.
Ex-husband.
That word still made her cringe, leading to that sickening slither inside. Even after six and a half years, she still felt the shadow of failure permanently trailing behind her. So much for ‘til death do us part, she thought. Barry must have had his fingers in his big ears when the preacher mentioned that part because when things got tough, he got going, leaving her with a mountain of fertility specialist bills and no one to share her life with.
Missy meowed about that time as a reminder that Kelly wasn’t completely alone. The little Calico cat demanding in her reserved, yet bossy way let Kelly know it was time to get moving, and a few treats in the cat bowl on the way out would be greatly appreciated.
“Okay, girl,” Kelly told her, replacing her sigh with a not completely felt smile as she stepped away from the computer to grab the cat treats. “So, what do you think, Mis? Am I being silly to even get my hopes up?” The little cat cocked her head then mewed again when Kelly Lynn hesitated over the cat bowl. “Sorry.” She poured the treats then stroked the little cat’s multi-colored back. “You know, his status said single. And we both know mine does too, through no fault of my own.” Kelly wished she actually felt that way. Barry had made it perfectly clear why he was leaving…and so had the belly of that bimbo she’d seen him with a few months later. Babies! Why were they so important anyway? And what did it matter that she’d been unable to have them?
She’d answer that later. But for now, she’d better set her mind to getting ready to leave. She had a bunch of other people’s children to take care of. Ah, the life of a childless preschool teacher. Talk about irony.
#####
“I don’t know, Cind. I mean, what if he doesn’t even remember me?” The small, auburn haired woman wrestled the bag of groceries that rested on her still-shapely hip while she fished in her bag for her keys to let herself back into her apartment. Her sister, only a year older than her, had already caught wind of a check mark next to Kelly’s name on the reunion roster, knew exactly who else was going, and what his marital status was. To say Cindy Murray was a busybody was an understatement. Almost as petite and well preserved as her younger sister, Cindy was highly single, childless, and extremely happy with her status and life.
“Then he’ll remember me.” Her slightly evil laugh told it all. Cindy had inherited all the not so good girl genes Kelly Lynn had not.
“Cynthia Marie Murray! Don’t you dare tell me you and Jake Sumner…”
“Okay, I won’t tell you,” Cindy interrupted, her laughter turning to an all out snortfest as Kelly continued her tirade.
“You are so… So… Oh!!! I can’t believe you! All those years of letting me drone on and on about him. You knew I liked him. You knew it and still…” An audible growl punctuated a grunt from Kelly as she finally managed to open the door.
“Oh, come on Kelly!” Cindy could barely talk through her laughter. “It’s not like you were ever going to do anything about it. He wasn’t your type and we all knew it.”
Kelly thought about that, listening with one ear while her sister went on about Kelly’s type and how she’d only had eyes for Barry Big Ears, before slowly returning the one-sided conversation back to the undeniably delicious Jake Sumner.
She hated to admit it, but Cindy was right. She was so afraid that Jake wouldn’t or couldn’t really see her in a girlfriend sort of way that she’d been afraid to try. She remembered all those hours alone with him while she’d been his Algebra tutor during their senior year so he could remain on the football team and not lose an athletic scholarship. He’d seemed so relaxed during those tutoring sessions, opening up to her, sharing things about himself that she was sure he didn’t go around telling everyone. And she’d certainly never told anyone, not even Cindy, that Jake Sumner was the boy she’d shared her first kiss with. She could feel her blood pressure rising while her mind floated back. Why, oh why had it happened the day before he left for college when he’d stopped by to thank her for getting him through the math course? All those years of daydreaming about meeting him in the art hall only to have him kiss her right there in her parents’ living room…
“…but he’d be oh so worth it. Consider that a tip from a girl who knows.” Cindy’s words broke the reminiscing. “Hey! Maybe I could get in touch with him before the reunion. Maybe drop a bug in his ear that a certain someone will be there waiting anxiously to see him?”
“And I’m sure you’d stop at just talking. Cindy! Don’t you dare. If you so much as…”
“Bye, Sis.” Cindy’s laughter tormented her through the receiver. “Let’s plan to shop this weekend. You don’t have much time for me to whip your boring wardrobe into shape for your rendezvous with Jakey Wakey! Who knows? Maybe he’ll kiss you … again.”
The line went as silent as Kelly Lynn’s breath. That Cindy! She knew everything … way too much for anyone’s good. And her nose was always in somebody else’s business. Mostly Kelly’s!
#####
Kelly Lynn was late getting to the afternoon reunion mixer. The anxiety she’d felt over seeing Jake again, or more over whether he’d see her, had made it nearly impossible to get ready without spilling this, or dropping that … all things that added to the time it took her to get ready, though once she walked through the door, she was glad she’d taken those extra minutes with her hair and the cute little dress Cindy had helped her pick out. She looked good; younger and springier than most of the other girls she’d graduated with twenty years before. Life as a preschool teacher wasn’t glamorous, but it wasn’t hard either, for her anyway. She taught the 4-5 year olds and loved helping them learn and grow. Her life, for the most part, was just like her: calm and even-keeled. And she knew that all worked together for her benefit. Even losing Barry. For the first time, she felt almost glad he’d walked away, realized being alone was definitely better than the loneliness she’d felt whenever he was around.
She pushed those gloomy thoughts from her mind, broadening her smile as a group of girls came up to hug her. She hadn’t had a lot of really close friends and yet everyone had loved Kelly. She spent the next forty-five minutes catching up with just about everyone … except the one person she really wanted to see. Disappointment gripped her insides and she let her head drop, missing the look on the faces of the other women gathered around as they gazed longingly over her shoulders.
“Hey, Kelly Lynn. How are you?”
Strong hands on her shoulders accompanied the masculine croon into the back of her hair.
“Jake,” she whispered, mostly because that’s all she could muster.
He chuckled lightly, pulling her against him, his arms wrapping around her upper body. “I was hoping you wouldn’t leave before I got here, especially after Cindy went to all the trouble to track me down to let me know you’d be here.” His voice was still a whisper, meant only for her ears.
Kelly Lynn leaned a bit to the right, craning her neck so she could turn to see his face. Cindy! Bless her soul.
“Good to see you too, Jake. Now let go of me so I can get a good look at you.” Kelly squirmed out of his grip and turned to look into the bluest eyes … eyes she remembered looking so deeply into hers right after he’d kissed her and right before they’d been interrupted by her older sister barging in. He’d smiled back then, chuckled a bit, and kissed the knuckles of her hands clutched in his. And then he was gone.
Until now. Here he was, again, her hands in his being raised toward his lips. Kelly thought she’d die a happy woman right then and there. It was obvious Jake Sumner was there for one reason and only one: her.
“Ladies,” he spoke to the group though his eyes never left hers. “If you’ll excuse us, we have some unfinished business that should have been taken care of years ago.”
Kelly wasn’t sure whose grin was bigger as he led her away from the group, though she was sure her laughter held an edge of sheer surprise that his did not.
“I was so afraid I’d be too late,” he told her as they walked out of the room, his arm slipping around her shoulder to pull her close. “You have no idea how many times I’ve kicked myself for leaving things undone with you, Kelly Lynn.”
Her brows crinkled a little. “Why didn’t you come back?” How different their lives might have been.
He shrugged, bit at his lower lip just a bit. “Your sister walking in kind of … it made me realize just how awkward things could be. I mean…”
Kelly laughed a little. “I know you two have history.”
“I don’t know if a few shared kisses can really be called history.”
Kelly was surprised to see his face turn a rosy shade of red, more surprised that it had only been kissing. But she smiled anyway, quite certain her sister had misled her for no other reason than to cause her to react. That was Cindy… knowing exactly what Kelly needed.
“Besides, when I came back at Christmas you were already with Barry Big Ears.”
Try as she might, Kelly couldn’t stifle the laughter that bubbled up at the way he said Barry’s name.
“You could have fought for me,” she teased.
“I should have. In fact, if he shows up here, I think I might have to go ahead and kick his a…”
Kelly was quick to put a hand to his mouth. She was already shaking her head. “It doesn’t matter. We’re here now.” She looked up to see where they were, unable to suppress a wide grin. “The art hall? Really?!”
He laughed as well before pulling her into the secluded little alcove just beyond the art room. It had been dubbed Lover’s Lane when they were kids. Kelly had never been there before, even though she’d dreamed about it many times … always being swept away to that place in an enchanted fairy tale that included Jake.
“This should have happened a long time ago, too,” he told her as he pressed her against the wall, moving to cover her mouth with his.
“Here’s to taking care of unfinished business,” she whispered against his lips before losing herself in the dream.